Sunday, July 20, 2014


Precedent, as defined by Merrian-Webster....


noun \ˈpre-sə-dənt\
: a similar action or event that happened at an earlier time
: something done or said that can be used as an example or rule to be followed in the future
: the usual or traditional way of doing something

Full Definition of PRECEDENT

:  an earlier occurrence of something similar
a :  something done or said that may serve as an example or rule to authorize or justify a subsequent act of the same or an analogous kind precedent
b :  the convention established by such a precedent or by long practice
:  a person or thing that serves as a model 
In this context, we use it as a noun. Even further, we use it as a way to describe why an action taken at a previous juncture was used to serve as an example to be used in the future. In this way, we see that anything that has been set as a precedent in a relationship, be it business, personal, or romantic, can be used to steer clear of, or to expect another action taken in a similar manner. 

Without being too cryptic, take this situation as an example: person asks other person to be at a job interview @ 9am. Interviewee can't make it to said interview because of another emergency or commitment, but yet made the commitment to the interviewer to be on time. Interviewer decides that although interviewee is fully qualified, this could be SETTING A PRECEDENT and decides to not reschedule. Interviewee then feels a sense of betrayal because they feel that this was something out of their control. Unfortunately, the interviewee does not see the forest for the trees, because this PRECEDENT has been set a while ago due to some choice or a path chosen incorrectly. 

Now in the matter of our lives, the foundation we set with people, businesses or partners all hinge on the precedents we set with them. This is how history works; the adage is "if we do not take history in to consideration, we are doomed to repeat it". 

Friday, June 06, 2014

The needy's need to be needy

Instant gratification; we are all guilty of it, well, at least I am. Ha. Anyway, this is possibly, in my opinion, the number one killer of goals or satisfaction.

Throughout my time on this earth, I have learned that if anything is worth having, its worth working hard for. With that said, let it be known that although I consider myself a hard worker, I can always do better to achieve my goals and aspirations. Moving on, I find it hard to swallow when I see someone putting long term goals aside or ideals for instant gratification. The feeling of desire is a STRONG one.... but as ADULT humans, we should be able to sort through our feelings and come to a conclusion that should suit out goals and meet our desired short term needs.

A person told me some years ago, after telling me that I placed a close second to someone in an interview, that I should continue to work hard to achieve my dreams, as the hard work I do now, WILL absolutely pay off. I am paraphrasing, but that's the gist of what was told to me. I try to live by this statement and use it everyday to re-evaluate myself. I know what I want and I know what I need to do to get it. I also know that I need to constantly evaluate what I am doing to reach those goals. I also know that I need to tweak things and check myself to stay on track. I believe that this applies to all things in life - business, personal relationships, friendships and matters of the heart. I also understand that whatever it is you want will be EXACTLY what you will reap. 

I constantly ask myself, what is it that you want? Is it the long-term, satisfying, full feeling of waiting and working hard for something you really want, or is to be needy. Need of the instant gratification that has you constantly wanting more.

Ultimately, its the needy's need to be needy that will win out. We have a choice.

Sunday, May 25, 2014

Behind the past

I'm an idiot - I hold on to the past. I constantly pine over days gone by, what I could've done better or am trying to atone for something I may have not completely followed through on. This could mean a relationship, work or anything personally that just may have not been fulfilling.

Catharsis comes from many different sources and I've used the past as a way to motivate me to achieve the things I thought I wanted in the past. For example, I put a screen shot of myself in the best shape I've been in as my computer background. I thought, "I need to look like that again". About a week later, my roommate sees it and says wow, you look way different. Of course, I took it to heart and told myself that I had to be there again. Fast forward a few days and roommate says, "Hey, now I know whats different about that picture! You don't have tattoos in that pic." Revelations filled my head and I realized that I will NEVER look like that because I am NOT that person. I am different. I am more than TEN years in the future and I'm wasting fucking time looking back. I've done it all my life and for not another second will I do that; I'm moving forward. I'm reinventing myself in an image that is all new. The person I was didn't get me to my goals that I had set for myself by 40 (which I will be in a month, fuck!).

The memories are good for stories and to be used as examples. If we do not move forward, we are going in reverse. An old Shotokan Karate axiom says. "In order to maintain hot water, you must constantly add hot water.". This is profound to me and something I have always tried to follow. Maybe I didn't realize that he was saying just that - add WATER. Not hot oil. Not warm milk. Not whatever the fuck I thought was better than hot water.

Hopefully we all get what we want and we deserve to be happy. We also owe it to ourselves to be the best we can be, EVERY DAY. Service is an important aspect of life, but also, if you can't serve yourself, you will never have the capacity to serve others.

Behind the past is the need to move forward. Do it every day.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

The Immortals

Death is constantly knocking on the door of our lives - shit, I could stumble out of bed, hit my head and be dead! Rhyme every time! Ha! Anyway, the only promise in life is death. I have had this discussion with many members of my family (friends) and there's always one question; what happens after we die?

Me, I've pondered this question more than I should've over the years. I've often struggled with the fact that I don't believe in any afterlife, at least not in the way that many think of it. I don't believe that you go anywhere, but into the ground and become fertilizer. I do believe that there is something bigger than us, but I don't believe that it has anything to do with what the fuck we are doing on this planet.

Life, itself, is fleeting; as is everything to do with life. Love, hate, struggles, successes all can be gone or come in a second. I've experienced what people would say is a miracle, but also experienced the absolute antithesis of that; losing all. That insight, is enough to implant the thought into my head - how do I become immortal? Do I want to be immortal?

Bart and myself had this discussion and he maintained that he wanted to be immortal - I couldn't get on board. Being consciously immortal wouldn't be rewarding. You wouldn't live with any sense of urgency. Who cares if you get up that day or not, you've got ETERNITY. As I said before, just as everything is born, everything dies. But I truly believe that you can be immortal......

Being Immortal is as simple as making yourself UNFORGETTABLE. Make your mark. Be that person. It doesn't matter with who or with what, but to the people that matter, make sure that they will never forget you. They will pass it on. No one worth not forgetting will EVER be forsaken. For me, that's what life is about. Put that indelible mark on the consciousness of those that need it or mean that to you...........

Everyone I hold dear to my heart, to me, are the Immortals.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Across the lines

Its often been said that successful relationships take much work; I subscribe to this, but I offer this in return. I believe that relationships are difficult, but only because people make them that way. I hold the belief that there are certain things that make ANY relationship successful and when you follow those, the relationship status will take care of itself.

In my experience, a relationship of any kind (business, personal, or love) is one that both parties have a vested interest in and will do whatever it takes to make successful. A relationship takes sacrifice. A relationship is a PARTNERSHIP, plain and simple. When you enter into a partnership, you also acquiesce to the fact that NO ONE gets everything they want. It's impossible to consider yourself without first considering your partner. It seems so simple, but with my lack of success in relationships, I have found that there is one binding action....... being inconsiderate of your partner.... that will cause a relationship to fail.

Most relationships for me have been a lot of me giving and not receiving. Of course, I have done my share of taking also. For the most part, I believe that I have a firm grasp on what makes a relationship successful. Trust, respect, being a good listener and lover, being insightful and being able to really put your partners thought and needs into action. It doesn't take much to make someone happy - take what they say and do it. Listen and be open to communication or moving out of your comfort zone. Relationships shouldn't be comfortable; they are a time of discovery and growth. Growing with your partner is a great way to try new things with someone you love and trust. Let it go!!!!!

In closing, I guess that if someone can take a morsel out of this and apply it to their own relationship, that would be a success for me. I've made the mistakes and had the successes..... please keep yours as new and shiny and great as it once was. Thanks for listening. 

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Interview with Brandon McGrath

Please check the other two interviews on my blog with Brandon...... thanks!!!!  

1. So it seems that every time we interview, you're in a new band and I am broken up with a girl, or with a new girl. Are bands as much drama as chicks?
- I would venture to say that bands and bitches supply an equal but different type of drama. Either way there is always the good times and the bad, as with anything in life.

2. Reno has been burning up in flames, getting decimated by earthquakes and shootings, yet all of our friends are still here and want to move back, if they left; why is that?
-Because the Reno/Tahoe area is a fucking great place to live! Being an adult in this town is different and fun, granted there is sometimes not alot to do, because we are a smaller town than SF or the like, but i enjoy my relaxation as much as i enjoy the playtime and there is plenty of both in our great city.  

3. Who is in your new band and how does this differ from all the rest? And can I just stand there and bob my head to the music, or will it evoke uncontrolled old-man mosh (and subsequent broken hips)?
-The new band is called Deadpool, named after the comic book character we all love/loved. It consists of Me(vocals), CJ Wintch(Beats/BackingVocs), Buck Feero(bass), Cole Hamel(Gitfiddle), and Joel Bedolla(stringmedleys). It is fun melodic HC with some inter-weavings of several different genres of music, and we are writing whatever sounds good and fun to us and what we think our "fans" will enjoy. There are a couple parts that i think might bring out the oldmanmosh in you my good friend!  

4. Did the interwebz ruin the underground, or is it a way to find what is cool, new, creative and original first? Shit, at least tattoos still hurt.......
-Accessibility, or a lack thereof, is what made the “underground” interesting and fun to be a part of. As soon as the Internet revolutionized the way people market themselves and whatever they were selling, it made everything accessible and lost the intrinsic value of having to know something or someone involved, and learning of it word of mouth. Now anyone can just point and click their way through life. People then, and now, were quick to adopt trends and styles based on whatever they googled that day and that is why we are constantly surrounded by posers, sellouts, dweebs, and fakes these days. Sometimes I wish the Internet would just die; but then I realize I need a new pair of shoes and have to go to Zappos because they have more color-ways and a dope selection son!  

5. I asked you this in your first interview - I wondered what you would be doing in 10 years! Well, its been five, how has life changed? Besides getting sexier as you age?
-Running 2 businesses, 2 dogs/kids, practically married because I have been with the same girl for so long. If anything has changed it has been for the better though. I am 30 years old now and have done and seen a lot, but there is still so much that I want to accomplish and do before I leave this earth. I crossfit as much as I can, and I am being diligent, finally, about getting back in shape. Things are looking up my friend.  

6. What is the answer to our global energy crisis? Or is there one?
-Nuclear, solar, wind, geothermal and proper responsible regulation and usage of these types of energy could run our whole country if properly implemented with sound infrastructure. Our government and people are however still hooked on oil because the transition to these alternative fuels, and methods of energy production, are not being facilitated by the main energy companies of America and the world. Like they say we vote with our dollars and unless the proletariat gets unlazy all of a sudden, and quits using oil/coal, then nothing will change. Such is life.  

7. The Constitution has 27 amendments, which one is the most important?
-I would have to say the first, of course, because it outlines our basic rights as citizens and protects us against a tyrannical government. After that the reconstruction amendments 13,14,15 are the most important by far; ending slavery, allowing everyone to vote, due process, citizenship, all the good stuff that makes our nation a great place to be from.  

8. How do I tell someone that I gave you a foot massage and that Im not gay..... AT ALL? Is it as difficult as telling someone you LIKE to rollerblade?
-You just tell them, and then if they talk shit you know they are insecure in their sexuality and probably not good people anyway! Foot massage bros for life!

9. I don't really get angry anymore, I've learned to channel it in different ways, therefore I have been pretty successful in the game of life lately; does anger drive you?
-I love anger sometimes, it has its places, although few and far between as we grow older. Rationality and a cool head are almost always the high road. Channeling anger is still using anger in my opinion, and in-fact, channeling it is what separates the mature and tactful from the irrational and ignorant.

10. Who runs Barter Town?
-You know who, MASTER BLASTER!!!  

11. And now, the ubiquitous straightedge question - how has it changed in Reno, or it is just like it always was?
-So different, so contrived, and bordering on meaningless sometimes when I see the current face of people involved with straightedge. My answer to your earlier question about the Internet applies to this a lot. I wish it was how it used to be, however I have the pride of knowing I was a part of it when it wasn’t cool and wasn’t defaced by shitty people. If you don’t know the lyrics to “the discipline” by Earth Crisis, you’re not straightedge bro! hahah  

12. People are people, but why do you think so many that we know have a heightened sense of entitlement? Where the fuck did that come from?
-This town breeds that in people, hence the term “reno famous.” Most people with that attitude are going nowhere fast and the people that deserve to have that chip on their shoulder usually are the ones who don’t even know the definition of entitlement. I’m here to party and chew bubble gum, and Francona stole all my double bubble so I guess it’s party time.

13. Dude, I asked you this last time also - have you had your defining day?
-I can definitely say I have grown as a man in this world a little bit every day, however, I still feel like there is something out there that I haven’t accomplished yet that will be my defining moment/day.  

14. Finally, give propers to those you want and Ill tag the shit outta them on this post and in my blog. And see you for the fights this weekend!!!!
-Big ups to my brother Jess Brown on his way to being a Nurse and doing big things best friends are hard to come by and I am proud that you are one of them. My good friends that I have known for years and consider brothers: Clifton Kump, Adam Krause, Troy Elizares, Rob Thompson, Allan Llaguno, Matthew Baker, Jose Galvan, Nate Weatherbee, The Wintch Brothers(Brad,CJ,Scotty), Matt “Tiny” Lowe, Elzo, Layne Kolbet, and a few I may have forgotten but will always be there for if ever needed. I love you all and hope the coming years bring us all prosperity, fortitude, and health. My SD family: Nicky Smalls, Gary Kindle, Chris Martin, Conan Dunn, Christian Morales, Marcellous “Brian Georgia Bulldog” Freeman, All the Barwest homies, the Victory MMA homies, and everyone that I have a good time with when I am in that town. Thank you all for the laughs and random fun we all have had, you are all the reason why I love that city. To my new Band mates CJ Wintch, Joel Bedolla, Cole Hamel, and Buck Feero, I am stoked to be doing music with you guys and if we stay diligent and have fun we will accomplish a lot with this project. Don’t hesitate to change things up or pass on criticism, because from it may come greatness! Haha. To my Crossfit Family: Thank you all for pushing me and encouraging me to strive for improvement every wod. It means the world to me, please believe! Adam Crull, Chris king, Ty Jones, and the rest of the gang at CFI. Much love to my sister Julie McGrath for being an amazing sister and someone I am proud to be not only a brother, but best friends with. Europe was unforgettable and thanks for putting up with me for 3 weeks straight! Moms, Barbara McGrath, you are beautiful and stronger than you give yourself credit for. Please take this year to start to realize your potential and do things that you have always wanted to do, but never got around to, because you doubted yourself or had an excuse not too. Me and Julie love you tons and really love to see you happy and well. Valerie Foley, I love you and always will. I hope this year is great for us and that you can progress even more to becoming the happy, beautiful girl that I have the privilege to see. No one understands you like I do and I hope you realize that, whatever problems, whatever you need, I got you, nothing else matters unless you let it matter. I'm sure there is other people I would like to mention however I don’t want to take up your whole blog so I will leave you with this. If a man is measured by the company he keeps, then they're gonna need a bigger tape measure, because the one that they use doesn’t measure into the echelon of awesomeness that me and my friends have attained!